Based:Battle of North Carolina

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The Battle of North Carolina was a short lived, 2 hour conflict between newfriends from the University of North Carolina and Duke University. The battle was not well know of, and mostly consisted of wooden swords. Fighting was located in unpopulated regions of Sussex.

Battle of North Carolina
Location
Unpopulated regions of Sussex
Result Technically Ongoing
Belligerents
Students at University of North Carolina Students at Duke University
A student at Elon University
Units involved
150 72
Casualties and losses
50 20

Quiet Beginnings

The war began on the quiet morning of September 14th, 2021, when discord user PringleWringle infiltrated a small discord made of up North Carolina students. PringleWringle began insulting the grandmother of discord admin DaBossBaby666, saying the grandmother “smelled like cottage cheese”, “had dementia”, and should “spend the last of her days in the middle of an Armenian orgy”. Although both insults were true, DaBossBaby666 was hurt, and challenged PringleWringle to a best of 5 in Bedwars.

The Battle of the Beds

The two belligerents fought on the evening of September 14th. The first game was a tense battle, with PringleWringle getting an early upper hand. However, after a successful bridge attempt, PringleWringle fell, claiming after the round that his “pet parakeet bit his pinkie”. DaBossBaby666 easily crossed the built bridge and destroyed his PringleWringle’s bed. The second game went much of the same, but PringleWringle this time successfully made it to DaBossBaby666’s platform, quickly disposing of both the player and the bed. Tied at 1, the third game was the most intense, with both sides building massive protections before attacking. The two met in the middle of the map, having a 2 minute battle. PringleWringle would be victorious, going on to destroying the bed.

In the aftermath of this defeat, DaBossBaby666 was furious. After some mocking by PringleWringle, DaBoddBaby666 challenged PringleWringle to a war on CivClassic, with the battle being set for the evening of September 16th.

The Battle of North Carolina

Surprisingly, September 16th came with a massive battle. DaBossBaby666 had recruited quite well in his CSE classes, and PringleWringle was part of the Duke Gaming Club, giving him access to many experienced gamers.

The two agreed to meet at 6900, -4450, which put them in the remote forests of Sussex. En route of meeting, both sides crafted basic battle materials, consisting mostly of wooden swords and leather armor.

When the two sides finally met, there was immediate carnage. Since most of the armies had no real care about the battle, there was no real strategy for the battle. It truly looked like a free for all, except for the two best equipped players: PringleWringle and DaBossBaby666. Both wielding iron armor, stone swords, and shields, their duel took place on a nearby hill, overlooking the carnage between the two armies. Strike after strike, block after block, the two couldn’t make progress in the fight. Suddenly, PringleWringle got behind DaBossBaby666, inflicting 5 hearts of damage. DaBossBaby666 started to run, getting on top of the trees and jumping in a way Tarzan would be proud. PringleWringle pursued. After a 5 minute chase, the two began to battle again, this time in the city of Alexandria in North Sussex. Again, the stalemate of blows continued. Just then, DaBossBaby666 saw leather-clad warriors running down a path. His army had followed! PringleWringle did not see these soldiers. The UNC units snuck behind PringleWringle, dispatching of his life quickly. A short celebration ensued, with the UNC army claiming victory. However, minutes later, PringleWringle had made his way back to the battlefield, spawning in at a hidden bed in an underground hole.

Fighting continued for hours like this, until one Duke soldier reminded everyone that it was Thirsty Thursday, and they would be getting off to go to the bar. A mass exodus followed, including PringleWringle and DaBossBaby666. The conflict left the soldiers minds that night as their livers were abused as much as their in game counterparts hours before.

Aftermath

No real resolution has come yet. PringleWringle was banned from DaBossBaby666’s discord server, but the two pm insults to each other on the regular. All other soldiers seem to have forgotten about the battle that took place.